“Would You Rather” movie review (spoilers!!)

And so it has come to this. Our first bad movie review. Welcome to David Guy Levy’s “Would You Rather.”

This movie didn’t even try to not be bad, it didn’t try to take a risk and failed, it played it safe and of course, that never gets you anywhere.

Half of this shit doesn’t even make sense. This woman, Iris (Brittany Snow), is taking care of her sickly, dying brother, apparently the rest of her family is dead, and she’s so desperate for money to pay for her brother’s treatment and her education that she agrees to go to some philanthropist she just met’s mansion to play some kind of party game that, if she wins, she’ll be provided with all the money she needs and some extra.

I guess that makes sense. But the execution is so boring. The film doesn’t trust its audience to figure out anything on their own, so they lay it all out for us. And that’s just no fun. Everything about Iris and her brother’s (Logan Miller) is revealed through a job interview in the first scene. Quiet, serene music adds a hint of tragedy to the air as the camera slowly zooms in on Iris. A poor girl who had to quit school and come back to take care of her orphaned brother. I can hear the director talking to the cinematographer; “yo, this music with this camera angle and the sad backstory will totally make the audience feel bad for her.” But here’s the thing. NOBODY IN REAL LIFE TALKS LIKE THESE CHARACTERS TALK. NOBODY OPENS UP THIS MUCH AT A JOB INTERVIEW. YOU’RE PLAYING INTO IT TOO MUCH. It doesn’t work when you get this obvious when you’re clearly trying to have us believe everything that’s happening so far is believable and normal.

“Listen, I understand that it’s not going to be easy, but I refuse to accept that you don’t have a price… a lifetime of discipline and commitment to cause wiped away by a mere ten thousand dollars.”

I guess the point of this movie is supposed to be that people will do anything for money. The people who attend the dinner party are asked to do things to themselves and to each other for money. For example, Iris is told to eat meat even though she has been a vegetarian for sixteen years. If she does it, she’ll get ten thousand dollars. It progresses to the point where people have to choose whether to stab or whip the person sitting next to them, whether to shoot themselves or cut their eyeball with a razor blade… all that fun stuff.

“It’s all about decision making in its rawest form…”

Another perfect example of the movie not trusting its audience to figure out the goddamn message themselves. I’ve been watching for thirty three minutes and they’ve told me what the message is like fifteen times. The main problem with this movie really just is that the production team was running on the thin idea that people will do anything for money, but weren’t confident in their own beliefs and therefore felt the need to pound it into our heads.

But it’s a great Halloween movie. The gore is intense and unique, and it is an interesting viewing experience as the actors aren’t bad, and the choices they have to make are interesting. You’re genuinely wondering what’s going to happen, and I found myself hoping for the exciting parts to stretch out more. It would be an excellent Halloween movie to watch with your friends. Or alone! Some of us aren’t that social. *cries*

OH BUT THE ENDING. THE STUPID ENDING. It made me so mad.

Iris wins the game after shooting the last guy standing. She gets the money. Everything is going to be okay! But when she gets home, her brother has killed himself because he felt like too much of a burden to Iris.

I could’ve appreciated this more if I hadn’t been listening to the movie explain their purpose behind every shot for an hour and thirty three minutes and didn’t feel like everyone who worked on this movie thought I was the dumbest person alive. This ending would’ve been the perfect way for them to SHOW their message about how much money controls our lives. Iris killed other people for it, her brother killed himself because he felt guilty for needing so much of it. Anyway, it was a good idea, but you already messed up the rest of the movie and I’m not giving you a second chance.

If you’re looking for more movies by David Guy Levy, I guess go watch “A Love Affair of Sorts” (2013) or “August” (2008) which he produced, not directed.